Move over Sir Wiggins…

For my 29^th birthday I was given a road bike.It’s been that long since I have owned a bike it felt like when I was 5 years old again with handlebar tassels and balloons attached to the crossbar.

This was back in October 2019. Since then I have been out a grand number of……. OK just once! This is an absolute shocker but to be truthful, the term “it’s like riding a bike” didn’t quite work with me. I don’t know if it was the thin road bike tyres, or the fact I have just got a little wimpy in my older age but riding it made me really nervous.

With the roads having next to no cars on them I thought now would be the ideal time to get my confidence up and get cycling. Throwback to the days of my cycling proficiency test at primary school, I literally felt like I had to relearn everything – even signalling with my arm without wobbling!!!

Here are 15 things I have learnt about cycling:

  Padded cycling shorts are an absolute must….. the more padding the better!

       Most chaps and gals I’ve seen out cycling look super hot in their cycling attire….. I do not!

  The uphill thigh burn is strangely addictive.
   
 Be prepared to be walking like John Wayne the day after a cycle.
   
  I don’t like going super whizzy down hills.
  
Pot holes are not your friend.
     
Gravel paths are also not your friend.
    
There are some pretty epic places right on our doorstep to discover.

    Tea and cake post run is always a wonderful idea…. And very much deserved.

 Downhills will turn you into a human windscreen with all the bugs that you will take out.

  Gloves are a necessity – if for nothing else to act as support for the excessive braking (possibly just me).

  Every time you will go out you will feel yourself getting stronger.

  Every bump you go over you will be ever grateful for said padding in lesson 1.

   Keep your mouth closed – the incoming flies are not the kind of extra protein your diet requires.

   Go at your own pace – like with anything else you do, no one else’s ability matters.

** Just a side note…. I know how fortunate I am with regards to being in a location that has allowed me to exercise during this time and not see a single person. Again this is simply how I have been coping and spending my daily exercise allowance during lockdown.

Dating in a Pandemic!!

If there was a single true representation of my dating life, then this is it!!

Me: I think I’m ready to date again…
The Universe: Oh yeah? *releases worldwide virus preventing all human interaction
Me: Well played.

Memes have definitely exploded in numbers lately and there doesn’t seem to be a second that goes by when I’m not tagged in one, or open up my messages to a barrage of them. When I came across that one it made me chuckle so much that I thought I would write a little post about dating during a global pandemic. Knowing my luck my “Mr Right” was probably meant to be crossing my path during this last month, but thanks to Covid 19 he’s now a goner. 😉

Offline dating seems near impossible nowadays, so throw in a 2-metre distance rule and you can say goodbye to the perfect little meet cute! Unless of course you lock eyes with the Amazon delivery driver as he wings a parcel up your garden path ( no innuendo intended).

So online dating is pretty much the most effective way to communicate with a potential date right now. With the forced nature of staying in we now have a prolonged period of time to get to know someone in a little more detail. Details that extend beyond more than just their occupation and where they enjoy going out for dinner.

Online dating has become ( in my eyes) so fast paced you feel a little bit like a piece of sushi at Yo Sushi… whizzing around the conveyor belt until you tickle someone’s fancy. Then, before you know it you’ve been shoved to one side and stacked with the rest of them whilst they crack on with the next! It has become easy to write someone off so soon thinking there is someone better out there. I feel this time now offers the opportunity to really get to know someone a little more. Slowing down that fast paced dating life we have become so accustomed to, giving someone more of a chance.  

With this in mind I thought I would create a little pros and cons list of dating during this time. 😊

+ Dating can sometimes feel like a full time job. We have now been offered the opportunity to invest in some quality time to get to know someone without so many everyday distractions.

x The unknown time frames of when you can actually meet is a little hard, BUT there is an element of excitement when it comes to the creativity of creating a virtual first date. This could be via Zoom or Facetime and can be a dinner date or a quiz… keep it fun and light- hearted. An extra bonus is you can blame your crappy Wi-Fi signal if you want to cut the date short…. No having to think of some awful excuse to get yourself out of an awkward date…. WINNER!!

+ On the flip side if you have become a little tired with the tedious realm of dating this time can provide the perfect little rest bite. It can offer a pause and the opportunity to work on your own hobbies and past times. This understanding of your genuine passions and interests may open up and offer new connections later down the line.

+ Apps like Tinder have become renowned for a quick fling which thankfully is a no go zone during the pandemic. This increases the chances of more genuine people setting up a profile for something a little more serious.  Finally the opportunity to  match with someone who is truly interested in getting to know YOU on a deeper level…. More than anything a quick drink at the local pub can uncover.

x A restricted radius makes it’s a little tricky to come across new connections. This could have meant that the postman is the only new connection that would pop up each day. Apps like Tinder and Bumble however, have made this a little easier by offering a passport/travel mode feature allowing you to set your location to somewhere else in the world. Cue finding yourself a cute American… a girl can dream of moving to the States right?

x The spark and excitement can feel like it’s lost quite quickly in lockdown as days can often feel a little bit like groundhog day.
Conversation can feel like it’s drying up or just simply not that exciting if all your days are the same. DON’T FORCE IT. This whole situation is one that’s out of the norm for all of us. Don’t see it as a sign you are not compatible, but just manage each other’s expectation of how you’re feeling. Keep things fresh and exciting and don’t feel like you have to text all day every day. And obviously those conversations that bore the tits off you don’t feel like you have to continue to entertain them at all.

+ Because time for once is a little more on our side how about expanding beyond your normal type? Be open to initiating conversations with someone that doesn’t fit your usual go to! We have the time to explore and get to know different people. This doesn’t always have to come from a romantic place, but a place to learn new things and make connections with new people. I have met some of the most interesting and wonderful friends since being single and dating, so don’t always see it as a quest for love interests.

Don’t forget it’s also ok to put a pause on dating during this time, scrap that… actually it’s ok to put a pause on it anytime. Scrap the idea that there is a time frame in which you should meet someone. If you’re not enjoying it, take a break. Dating is meant to be fun and exciting...  what is meant for you will never pass you by.

Side note….. Thoughts go out to all the players and serial cheaters who I’m sure are really struggling during this time 😉 shame that !!!!

I would love to hear how you are navigating your way through singledom in lockdown.

*Image credit for the first image is Pratik Gupta 
**Image credit for the second image is Charles Deluvio
***Image credit for the third image is Free as a mustard seed

Life in Lockdown...

I have questioned whether to write about this, as I like many others have been trying to avoid the C word as much as possible. I then thought about my motivation to create this blog. It was heavily inspired by how I’m winging my way through life, and doing what I feel is right for me in that moment.

 I think we can agree we are all truly trying to wing it during this time, and attempting to navigate our way through this adapted norm. I want to make it clear that by writing this post is not a way of making this time seem all sunshine and rainbows. I am simply trying to seek out the little opportunities and make what I can of this extremely difficult situation.

I also thought it would act as a useful reminder to myself of the little things I took pleasure in when everything goes back to normal ( what ever that may look like). If life becomes a little hectic and stressful again I have this as a prompt and a reminder of a simpler way of living.

So here it is….

Stay Home 

I’m not denying the painful time people are currently experiencing, the lives that are being lost, and the sheer strength and heroism of our key workers. The strength and resilience of all those staying at home, those trying to juggle an impossible work load of being a parent, partner and business person all rolled into one… I salute you.
 But life in lockdown has us all coping in our own ways, and so I thought I would share how I’m keeping busy. 

Just because society is telling you to do yoga, bake banana bread and learn a new language, if these things aren’t what you enjoy doing, DON’T F***ING DO THEM! No amount of downward dog and dough kneading is going to make you feel better, or your life more fulfilled if these things don’t bring you pleasure. This is a time to discover or rediscover what exactly it is that brings you happiness. If this is staying snuggled watching a boxset, then make sure you have a damn good set of snacks and enjoy doing just that! Get rid of the damn guilt. 

I have also learnt not to try and push your hobbies and interests onto others, or be offended if they don’t spark the same enjoyment or happiness for them as they do you. Find out what it is they love and be their cheerleader.

As some one who likes to be in control ( yes I said it, I’m a little bit of a control freak) this whole situation can very quickly feel super overwhelming. It was therefore important to me to focus on the things I can control and see it as a time to form new habits.

Health and fitness:
One thing I was adamant I wanted to control was my health and fitness. I feel I am the queen of starting a new crash diet plan. Then promptly falling off the wagon a short week into trying something new. Dinners out or plans with friends always take priority and I quickly find my work undone and being back to doing the funny jig to put my jeans on and feeling crappy about how I look in clothes. Just before we went into lockdown I started on Lindsay Beales  CFL course….. this has completely changed my mindset surrounding food and exercise. My goals are an element I have control over during this time which has given me a really good focus. I'm therefore hoping to come out of lockdown a little less chubs. 

Calligraphy: 
I have always been completely addicted to stationery and have always wanted to learn calligraphy. Thanks to Imogen Owen's online course, and a wonderful workshop with Bethan at Flick & Flourish (that I completed before lockdown) I have fallen in love with this style of writing.
 Mindfulness and yoga are both something I’ve tried in the past to help establish that sense of zen. Yet historically with very little success! The second I pick up my nib and ink I go into a complete present space where worry and over thinking completely disperses. I've definitely learnt it's important to find out what works for you to de-stress and helps bring you peace.... What works for one person may not work the same for you, and that's ok.
This is a hobby I have completely fallen in love with so I will do a separate post all about this later.

Books: 
My “to read” pile is ever growing and I normally feel guilty about sitting and reading a book, feeling like I should be using this time “being busy” and more productive. During this time I have loved nothing more than sitting in the garden or a comfy chair in the kitchen with a cup of something hot and a good read. This is something I want to continue doing as part of my weekly routine.

So far I have read:

• The Modern Break Up
• The Cactus
• Little fires everywhere ( our most recent book club read)
• Countless articles in Red magazine

I would love to hear what you have been reading and enjoying.

Declutter:

This is something that I’ve needed to do for so so long. Not just a little wardrobe clear out or organising the airing cupboard, but a full top to bottom house declutter. I’ve been tackling a room every couple of days and so far managed to sort out a significant amount of stuff to get rid of. Once lockdown is lifted, I will look to sell some items and take the rest to charity. This has decluttered more than just the house and I feel so much less suffocated by stuff!!! I am able to get my hands on projects I wish to complete rather than feeling the overwhelming sense of having too many things pending.

Baking:
You can’t go through a single scroll of Instagram without being bombarded with countless bakes and buns. I have yet to jump on the bread baking wagon but have enjoyed making an apple cake and brownies for family member's birthdays. I am going to look at being a little more experimental with baking little treats for friends and family.

Journaling: 
My journal has never seen so much action!! Creating my morning pages has really helped make sense of the thoughts whizzing round my head. Morning pages are simply a way of doing a brain offload onto the paper.... there doesn't have to be any kind of structure or correlation to what you write, just allow yourself to write freely. I always aim to write about 3 pages of A5. I find this has really helped during this time, and doesn't always have to be done in the morning. You can be a rebel and do it in the evening if you find that a more suitable time to offload before bed.

Music: 

Music will forever be such a saviour. When you are happy you hear the tune, when you are sad you hear the words. This is so true and I have taken such grateful pleasure in those moments of solitude  to create the perfect playlist to compliment my mood. Whether I have needed to dance around the kitchen or just take a little moment of sadness I have been grateful to so many incredibly talented artists. 

Also a mini virtual fist pump in celebration of The High Low podcast being back!!  

Group chats and mini catch ups have also been a beautiful and heartfelt filled moment during this time. Knowing you are surrounded by the most incredible people is the most important thing in the world.

There are days I have exercised, done a full skincare routine, baked and ticked everything off my to do list. And others where I have stayed in my pj's sipping endless cups of tea and working my way through the Desperate Housewives’ boxset. Both I have come to realise are completely ok. We put so much pressure on overachieving all the time when actually listening to what your body and mind want are sometimes the biggest and most successful achievement of them all.

However and what ever you are doing in lockdown, know you are doing a marvellous job.And if the biggest thing you have done today is put on socks that match then go you beautiful one! 

*   Photo credit for the first image is Christopher Harris.
** Photo credit for the final image is Logan Weaver